


From Before I was Me

by MarquisDC



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Adjusting to life after the Rebellion, F/F, Post-Canon, Questions
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2020-12-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 18:13:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 12,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25370698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarquisDC/pseuds/MarquisDC
Summary: The war is over, and the Rebellion victorious.  Now that everyone has a chance to breathe, Adora is bothered by thoughts of her past, what is she willing to do for answers?
Relationships: Adora & Bow & Catra & Glimmer (She-Ra), Adora & Hordak (She-Ra), Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 18
Kudos: 158





	1. Nagging Question

Adora watched as Entrapta and Hordak continued their work on salvaging data from Horde Prime's Spire, It still weirded her out to see Hordak on their side. It had been a couple of months now though, and he had been on his best behaviour. If he wasn't working with Entrapta he was with Rodak (formerly Wrong Hordak) helping the other clones adjust to their new lives. She wanted to believe that she could trust him to help her now, but she was nervous. Adora wasn't ready to handle an 'I can't' or 'I won't'. She also couldn't let this go. Adora took a deep breath and approached the pair.

"Hordak?" Adora said. "Can I speak to you for a minute?" Hordak turned his eyes widening slightly as he saw who was calling his name, but still he stepped away from the console. 

"Yes, Adora?"

Adora took a deep breath "So I was wondering, you know a lot about portals and stuff like that and like I know you weren't actually the one who created the portal that brought me here as a baby that was Light Hope, but by any chance do you know where that portal came from? I mean not came from, but like where did the other side connect to?" Adora clamped her mouth shut as she was starting to ramble. She could not bring herself to look at Hordak as she spoke, but as he replied she lifted her head.

"The portal had closed by the time I reached your location, I did not have a chance to examine it. Can you not ask this Light Hope?"

"She's gone, I mean her program is."

"I see, still perhaps if I had access to the computer itself I could retrieve that information... Or perhaps I could assist Entrapta, if you would prefer that."

"I'll think about it, thanks Hordak." With a nod Adora turned already lost in thought. 

\---

Adora, Bow, Catra, and Glimmer caught each other up on their day over dinner. Bow had been over in Salineas, helping with the reconstruction. She-Ra had already fixed the Sea Gate itself, but there was still a lot of work to be done. Same with the former Fright Zone, or Lightning Land as Scorpia was now calling it, though the name wasn't really catching on. Catra relayed Scorpia and Perfuma's regards along with an invitation to their Drum Circle/Concert. 

Glimmer of course had been everywhere else, checking in with Frosta, Spinnerella and Netossa and various villages and towns.   
Finally Adora let the others know she was going to pull Entrapta and Hordak away from the spire to work at the Crystal Castle, to find out more about the portal.

"Is that really a priority right now?" Bow asked. "There are a lot of planets out there, shouldn't we focus on places like Krytis or finding the Star Siblings?"

"There could be another Heart of Etheria out there." Adora said. "We know Horde Prime defeated the First Ones, but with him gone, who knows if they might still have something that they were just waiting for a chance to use. We can't get rid of one empire and have another one take its place. We freed the universe; we have to make sure it stays that way."

Bow nodded and fell silent, but exchanged meaningful looks with Glimmer and Catra.

\--

It wasn't until they were getting ready for bed that Catra decided to broach the subject. 

"Hey Adora?" Adora poked her head out of the bathroom, toothbrush still in her mouth. 

"Yesh?"

"You want to tell me why you really want to find out more about the portal?"

Adora coughed heavily and ducked back inside to get to the sink before she spat everything onto the floor. Catra waited until Adora returned to the bedroom before continuing. "Seriously, despite your annoying hero complex there aren't any bad guys anymore. Horde Prime never would have let the First Ones keep anything, There probably aren't even any First Ones left."

"But there has to be," Adora said. "Or at least there had to be 20 years ago. Light Hope took me from somewhere, from someone. I know when we were kids in the orphanage we were always told to be grateful to the Horde for rescuing us, but didn't you ever wonder about what happened before then?"

Catra's first instinct was to lie. To say that whoever had her before the Horde threw her away and didn't matter. But even earlier today she was working with Perfuma to be more in touch with her emotions and to be honest about them. "Sometimes," she said quietly.

"Then you know how I feel." Adora said. "Maybe I was always destined to come here, to be She-Ra, but at some point I could have been someone else. I want to know who that was."

"But look at who you are now. You have everything you could possibly need, aren't I-we enough?"  
Adora looked at Catra, her girlfriend was refusing to look at her and her tail was swishing rapidly. 

Adora took Catra's face between her hands and touched their foreheads together.

"Of course you are!" Adora said. "You're the most important thing in the world to me. I made a promise I would never go anywhere without you again. But ever since Light Hope told me the truth about my past I've had this nagging question about it, and you're the one I want, no need, to help me answer that question. Okay?" Adora kissed her gently. 

"Also I really am worried about what the first ones are capable of. It wasn't Horde Prime draining worlds of their magic, it was the First Ones, and if we're going to bring magic back to the universe we really should know what they can do once they have access to it again." 

Catra studied Adora's face, she knew that look. It was total sincerity. She chuckled. "You really are an insufferable goody goody, you know that?" Adora pouted in protest. Catra laughed louder and kissed her. One kiss became several, and the kisses grew deeper and the time for talking was, for now, over.


	2. An Unexpected Diversion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adora gets closer to the answers she seeks, but before she can do anything with this information. Another matter pops up that demands everyone's attention.

As it turned out, Entrapta and Hordak couldn't work at the Crystal Castle the whole time, but they went a day here, a day there. Once they got the communications at the spire fully operational however, they were able to devote more time to scouring Light Hope's memory banks. It was a few weeks later when Entrapta delivered the news to Adora. 

"As you know the Crystal Castle's memory logs are very patchy and broken, plus you did a lot of damage when you broke the sword-do you still have the pieces to the sword? I know I couldn't do anything then, but with everything I've learned and all the new technology we have I bet I could-"  
"Don't worry about the sword," Adora said. "Does that mean you couldn't find any record of the portal?"

"No, well actually yes, but really no, technically-" 

Adora stared. "Which is it?"

Entrapta blinked. "Well we couldn't find any information on creating a portal, but then Hordak had this brilliant idea of approaching the problem laterally. He pointed out that it takes a lot of power to generate a portal so maybe we should look for records of long blackouts or other signs that a lot of power was needed, and we found something. Around 20 years ago the Crystal Castle went into stasis mode, it even had a name. The Eternia Protocol." 

Adora's face fell. "Eternia? That's just a password, the First Ones used it for all sorts of things."

"A password?" Entrapta said. "That's weird, I would have added some numbers or wrote it backwards, not just use some planet as a password."

"Wait, it's a planet?"

"Oh sure. I didn't recognise the word so we put it into Horde Prime's database and it gave us coordinates for a planet."

Entrapa continued to talk about the database, but Adora's mind was elsewhere. Of course Eternia was a planet. It has to be the home planet of the First Ones, could some of them still be living there? Could her parents?

Adora didn't get a chance to dwell on this new revelation long, almost immediately after she made it back to Bright Moon, Glimmer grabbed her and teleported them to her room.

"I cannot believe what my dad is making me do! All that time on Beast Island must have scrambled his brain. Can you believe him?"

"Oh no of course not, he's crazy-what's he making you do again?"

"It's more of what he's making Bow do, he's insisting that Bow go through the whole Declaration of Intent to be the Royal Consort."

Adora's eyes went wide and watery. "Wait, are you and Bow getting married?"

"I wish Bow and I were getting married." Glimmer caught herself and blushed. "It's more like he becomes an 'official' boyfriend so it's all proper before we can get married. 'It's a matter of protocol.' It was one thing to be together all the time when we were both soldiers in the rebellion, but now… Also it technically makes Bow a Prince."

"Prince Bow?" Adora couldn't help laughing. Glimmer laughed too. 

"I think it'd be good for him though. He'd never admit it but he's always felt a little left out of the whole Princess thing."

"So what does this whole declaration entail?" Adora asked.

"We invite a bunch of guests, they watch as Bow formally declares his love, I formally declare mine, I name him my Consort, and then there's a dance." 

"That sounds needlessly complicated."

Glimmer sighed. "Matters of royalty often are. Remember all the rules of Princess Prom?  
"Oh yeah. So when is this 'Declaration' happening?"

"Next week. You and Catra will help Aunt Casta and me to get everything ready right?"

"Not going to make any promises about Catra, but I'm in."

\--

To Adora's surprise, Catra was very helpful in preparing for the Declaration, she complained and made fun of everything, but she did help. There was one problem though…

"I told you, I'm not wearing a dress!"

"Please Catra," Castaspella pleaded. "We have the best dressmakers in Etheria coming, they'll make you such a cute dress.-"

"I don't want a cute dress, I don't want to be cute!" Catra's tail was whipping back and forth so hard you could hear it slicing the air.

Adora squeezed past Glimmer to get between Castaspella and Catra. "Actually it's probably for the best. Tails and dresses don't really work together. Very awkward."

"But Scorpia can-" Adora gently elbowed Glimmer. "Oh um yeah Aunt Casta, everything gets tangled up, we don't want an accident on the dance floor after all."

"Okay fine," Castaspella relented. She turned back to Catra. "Go find Bow and ask him to set you up with the tailor."

An odd look came over Adora's face. "You know maybe I should set one up too—"

Casta glowered at her. "Absolutely not. You don't have a tail, so you will wear a dress."

"I could come as She-Ra, that way I won't need an outfit. I don't think She-Ra's clothes can even come off."

This time Glimmer spoke. "No She-Ra, I want you there as you, not her." Adora realised she shouldn't push her luck any further so she just nodded."

Casta smiled. "Good, now that that's settled, I'll see you for fittings at 3, but for now I need to talk to the caterers. Glimmer if you would be so kind." And with that, she took Glimmer's hand and they teleported away.

"You know," Catra said after Glimmer and Casta had left. "Normally I hate it when you pull the hero routine, but you know.. thank you"

"It's okay. I should have said something earlier, but I didn't understand until now." Adora cupped Catra's face with her right hand. "It's not like it was when we were growing up in the Horde. People calling you cute doesn't mean they're calling you helpless."

Catra sighed and leaned into Adora's hand. "I know, but still the thought of people looking at me- other people looking at me like that. It's too much."

"I understand, it's still weird for me too, but take your time." Adora blushed slightly. "Besides, you look hot in a suit."

Catra raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Who knows, maybe once I have the suit, I can model it for you, then you can turn into She-Ra and we can find out whether or not her clothes can come off."

Adora blushed deeper. Catra laughed and stepped away. "I better go find Bow. I'll see you later."

Adora left in the other direction, still blushing as Catra's laugh followed her down the hallway.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't find anything in the show to contradict this, so it's my personal headcanon that Catra scratched Octavia's eye out because she called her cute.  
> As for the Declaration, when I looked at Princess prom and glimmer's Coronation quest. I felt like a big public proposal seemed like something they could do in Bright Moon.
> 
> I realise this is another short chapter, but they will be getting longer. I hope you enjoyed


	3. The Declaration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bow and Glimmer have their ceremony. Adora explains Horde customs. Now beta reader so sorry if i missed anything

Catra really did look amazing in her suit. It was red, with gold lining the inside and along the edge of the lapels. She matched it with a simple white shirt. A undone red bow tie draped around her neck. The tailor had tried to tie it for her; Once.  
Her hair had grown back quickly since Horde Prime cut it, not to what once was, but now it brushed her shoulders, wild as always. Adore tried and failed not to stare.

Adora wasn't the only one having trouble not staring. Catra's eyes widened as she took in her girlfriend. Adora was wearing a flowing white dress with a golden belt. Her hair was done up elaborately in a high bun and a delicate tiara with a small moonstone in the center encircled her head.

Catra broke the silence before it got too awkward. "Hey Adora." She stepped towards Adora and ran her finger along the edge of the tiara. "This is nice, but you really should wear your hair down more often. I keep telling you, you're going to go bald if you keep pulling your hair tight all the time."

"I know, but I don't want anything obscuring my vision, I need to keep an eye out for-"

"For what? Someone taking too many crab cakes?"

"No- I-I'm being an idiot aren't I?"

"You said it, not me."

"I just want this day to go perfectly for Glimmer and Bow," Adora said.

"It will. C'mon." Catra took Adora's hand. "Let's go, we don't want to be late."

\--

The throne room of Bright Moon was filled with people. Each Princess was with a contingent of her own kingdom, except for Scorpia, her kingdom was still being rebuilt, not to mention most of her current subjects were former Horde soldiers and clones of Prime so they thought it best if they stayed at home. Scorpia wasn't alone though, she was standing with Perfuma and the Plumerians. Bow was at the rear of the hall with his dads and brothers. Glimmer was on the throne, with Micah standing off to one side. Adora and Catra were near the front with the rest of the people of Bright Moon. Looking at Glimmer, Adora wished she could be with her as the young queen tried vainly to keep still. Then she looked at Bow and felt an equal pang of sympathy for him.

From somewhere near the back of the room trumpets blared, the guests quieted down and turned to watch Bow walk his way to the throne. Bow's pace was steady and the closer he got to Glimmer the calmer he seemed.  
Bow stopped about ten feet from the base of the throne, gave a deep bow then turned to face the room.

I am Bow, of the Whispering Woods, former Tech Master of the Rebellion. I am here today to declare my love for Queen Glimmer, and my desire to be her Consort, in the hopes that one day we may wed." He turned back to Glimmer. "You are the light in my sky. I love you and pledge to you my heart." Bow lowered his head and dropped to one knee.

Glimmer stood and called out in a strong clear voice. "I Queen Glimmer of Bright Moon declare my love for Bow of the Whispering Woods and declare him my Consort until such time as we are wed." She looked at Bow. "You are the magic in my night. I love you and pledge to you my heart."   
As she finished, Glimmer descended and walked over to a still kneeling Bow. She put her hand under his chin, tilted his head back and kissed him. "Rise my consort," she said as Bow stood and faced the crowd.

"The Queen and her Consort! Micah declared.

"The Queen and her Consort!" The crowd returned.

With the official part of the ceremony now completed, the mood became much more celebratory as everybody began to intermingle.  
Adora managed to get some alone time with Glimmer, as Bow and Catra were talking with Scorpia and Perfuma.

"How do you feel?" Adora asked as she poured Glimmer a glass of punch.

"Exhausted, relieved that it's over, but honestly very happy. It's not that this changed anything between Bow and I really, but there's something nice about things being official." Glimmer arched an eyebrow. "Besides not everyone can be indecent like you and your girlfriend."

"Adora choked on her punch. "What do you mean?" 

"I mean the instant we all got back to Bright Moon, Catra moved into your room no question about it. I'm sure a few of the servants were scandalised."

Adora's face turned a shade that was a near match for Catra's suit. "Oh come on, it can't be that big of a deal, when I first came here you guys slept in my room a lot."

"Yeah but that was a group, and you had never been alone before. Technically we were keeping an eye on you. Also it was wartime, and a lot of rules got bent. It's different now. But seriously I'm just teasing. Mostly."

Glimmer picked up a crab cake from a passing waiter. "So did they not have anything like Declarations in the Horde?

"Kind of, I guess Adora said." Cadets and common soldiers slept in barracks together. Force Captains get their own quarters" She paused. "Huh, I just got promoted before I came here and found you guys, I never got moved into my own room. I wonder what it would have been like to have my own room in the Fright Zone… Sorry where was I?   
Oh right barracks, so yeah if two soldiers wanted to be a couple they would make a request for private quarters together. Catra and I would stay up at night trying to guess who would be the next to make the request. I was terrible at it. The closest I got to winning was I guessed someone right but I was completely wrong about who their partner was. Catra didn't let me forget about that for-" Adora stopped as she saw the look on Glimmer's face.

"What?"

"I just think it's kind of sad. It doesn't sound very romantic at all."

"Oh there was plenty of romance it just wasn't very public. It could be seen as a weakness sometimes, and the Horde was not a place to be weak."

"Ah," Glimmer said. "At least now you're in a place where you don't have to hide your feelings and be open about who you love, even if it does mean having to go through a big public show about it sometimes."

"Yeah," Adora agreed as she grabbed her fourth cupcake.

As they ate, Adora looked around the room, Bright Moon had so many traditions. How many of them came from the First Ones? Did they do Declarations? Even now in the middle of a party Adora found herself troubled with questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The basic concept of Horde couples getting together was borrowed with some tweaks from Casting Out Shadows by Paganaidd, https://archiveofourown.org/works/24611794/chapters/59456143 I just wanted it to be a little more prosaic, for where I'm going.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the Declaration, Adora comes to a decision.

Later that night, Adora found herself wide awake. She carefully exited the bed and made her way to the waterfall. She splashed some cool water on her face then looked back at the bed. 

Adora took comfort in watching Catra's chest rise and fall as she slept, knowing she was breathing strong. Catra wasn't the only one who had nightmares about the day Adora rescued her from Horde Prime's ship. 

Reluctantly Adora turned away from the bed and made her way to the window. The stars still amazed her. George and Lance had her come by for a few nights to help translate some ancient star maps they had. She had learned quite a lot. Things had changed in a thousand years but the constellations were still there. 

There was Askolos the Dragon, Errinfol, the Maker and she could just see the right half of Reffel the Eagle. You couldn't see it from here but if you followed the line made by the three stars that made the bottom of Reffel's left wing it point to the center star of Serenia, the constellation that marked where Mara's ship crashed a thousand years ago.

Mara had turned against the First Ones, Adora still wondered what that meant. Were the First Ones as bad as Horde Prime? Two evil empires fighting for domination of the universe? But then again Mara said it wasn't all bad at first. Could the First Ones have simply been desperate? Driven to the path of total destruction as their only chance for survival. She-Ra was a force of pure good. Adora knew that, felt that with every fibre of her being, but Madame Razz said She-Ra was here before the First Ones, so how do they connect? 

Light Hope wasn't here to give her the answers, but even if she was could she trust them? Madame Razz couldn't give her answers, at least not answers she could understand. The only place she could get her answers from was somewhere out there.

Adora had come to a decision. She was going to find Eternia. Adora looked back at the bed. She also knew she couldn't do it alone. 

Adora slipped back into bed and gently pressed herself into Catra's back. Wrapping her arm around Catra's waist Adora closed her eyes and finally fell asleep. 

\--

"You want to go and find Eternia now?" Glimmer asked after Adora brought it up at lunch the next day. "We've only just begun to prepare to go back into space. We haven't made contact with the Star Siblings yet. Aunt Casta hasn't narrowed the list of volunteer sorcerers to study Krytis's magic. We're not ready."

"I'm not talking about those plans, this is different. I'm talking about going to one planet just to see what's there. It could be vitally important to our mission as a whole."

"I get what you're saying," Bow said. "But does it have to be now? Maybe we should let Hordak and Entrapta finish going through Light Hope's memory banks. Plus there's still Horde Prime's flagship. We could gather information from-"

"From the giant tree that's replaced his computer server?" Adora said. "Light Hope is a thousand years out of date. We can't learn anything here, and the longer we wait the greater the risk."

Glimmer and Bow looked at Adora helplessly. 

"Catra?" Glimmer asked.

"We should do it, as soon as possible."

Bow stuttered. "Y-You really think-"

"I really do." Catra said. "Remember how I kept beating you? I had all the information and you were in the dark. Then you had more information than me and turned it around." The last sentence was mostly mumbled, but Catra's voice became clear again as she continued. "Information is key and we don't have it, and this is important information to have. But just forget about all that for a moment." 

Catra gestured at Adora. "Look at her. Can't you see how bad she needs this? After everything she's done- for all of us. We owe her this."

Bow and Glimmer looked slightly ashamed of themselves.

"You're right," Glimmer said. "I'm gonna talk to my dad and tell him he owes me one for the Declaration and he can be King again for a little while."

"I'll talk to Entrapta," Bow said. "Have her get Darla space ready. Then I'll go to my Dads' and find out whatever information they have on Eternia."

After they left, Adora turned to Catra.

"Catra I-"

"You thought I was going to agree with them and try to talk you out of it."

"Well, yeah."

Catra laughed. "That's 'cause you're an idiot. I've been thinking about this a lot since you first brought it up. I can't very well demand that you figure out what it is that you want, and then get mad when you do."

Adora frowned. "Wait, you know that this doesn't change anything about us, right? I would never go anywhere without you."

"I know," Catra said. "You spent your whole life in the Horde, then found out they were lying to you about everything. Then you become She-Ra and find out that hologram was lying about what that meant too. That is all kinds of crazy. It's no wonder you don't feel like you know who you are. And What kind of girlfriend would I be if I didn't help you figure that out?"

"I- you- That was incredibly insightful. How did you do that?" Adora's eyes narrowed. "Double Trouble if that's you I'm gonna-"

Catra laughed again. "It's me I promise. I've been talking to Perfuma and Melog, they help a lot." Catra paused. "Also, maybe I should have said something sooner, but when you were gone and I was Hordak's second in command I took advantage and used the computer system to try and find anyone that you know, looked like me."

"Oh, Catra."

"I never found anything, but I don't know what I would have done if I had, so I really do understand what you're going through."

Adora took Catra's face in her hands. "I love you so much.

"I love you too," Catra said as she nuzzled her cheek against Adora's palm. "There's just one small thing though. I've also been talking to Melog about the First Ones that came to Krytis. He doesn't have nice things to say about them. So if we find these First Ones, and they turn out to be a bunch of assholes and try something, I'm clawing their eyes out."

"Deal," Adora laughed, kissing her.


	5. Hordak's Seeking Redemption

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adora has a conversation with Hordak and the squad prepares to leave

After about a week they were almost ready to leave. The Best Friend Squad plus Entrapta and Hordak were loading Darla up with supplies.

"I think I've got everything I need." Entrapta said as she came back down the ramp. "Now we just need to get Hordak's equipment."

There was an awkward silence. "Umm, Entrapta," Glimmer said. "Hordak isn't coming."

"Why not?"

"Well um, you see.." Glimmer looked to the others for help. Surprisingly it was Hordak himself who answered.

"The galaxies have been under the oppressive reign of my brother for centuries," he said. "There is no doubt that my presence would actively disrupt any progress you'd endeavour to make with local populations."

"Oh," Entrapta said, her voice small. "Then maybe I should stay too."

"Entrapta no, we need you." Bow said.

"He's right." Hordak added. "Your expertise would be needed to figure out what alien technologies would be most useful to us."

"That makes sense," Entrapta said. Her eyes took on a familiar gleam. "So many new worlds and technologies out there. I know! I'm going to boost Darla's communication array so we can talk every day about all the new stuff I find. I need more equipment." Entrapta ran off to her workshop.

"Thank you," Adora said to Hordak.

"I spoke the truth. This face would not be welcome out there."

Adora grew still. "Hordak, why are you helping us? Not just with this, but with everything. Why stay to rebuild a planet full of people who will probably never forgive you."

Hordak couldn't quite meet her eyes. "Before I came through the portal that stranded me here my life belonged to Horde Prime. Then I was here, cut off from the hive mind, truly alone. What greater punishment could there be? So I did what I thought would be Prime's will, conquer this strange place and find a way to return to him. I sought to make myself worthy in his eyes. So I copied his methods, his casual cruelties. I knew of nothing else. Then, Entrapta came and showed me more.

Hordak paused, deep in thought before he continued his confession.

"Then I got what I wanted, or what I thought I wanted when I was reunited with Prime. Instead I learned nothing I had done mattered and I was to be purified, no, erased."

But I could not go back to what I once was, not completely. I had perspective now, I understood what the Horde was doing to the universe, because it was doing it to me. And so in some small ways I began to rebel." Hordak acknowledged his choice of words with a wry smile.

"Then just as I thought I had won my freedom, Prime showed me how wrong and how small I was. When I was part of the hive mind having Horde Prime take control of you was a blessing, he chose you to be an instrument of his will. But after? To have your will, your very essence crushed beneath his foot?" Hordak looked over Adora's shoulder. "Has Catra told you what that was like?"

Adora turned, Catra was busy with Bow loading supplies on to Darla.

"She um, doesn't like to talk about it."

"I can't imagine she would," Hordak agreed. "What I am willing to say is that the feeling of freedom and joy I felt when you burned Horde Prime from my mind was so great, that I still feel a need to pass on that feeling to as many people as I can."

Adora was stunned.

"I cannot truly say I regret all my actions, as without them I would not be here, now, in this place, but I must do my best to repay the terrible costs that others have had to pay for my awakening."

"You're a surprisingly good man Hordak." Adora said, her voice catching ever so slightly.

"I am trying to be." Hordak suddenly looked uncomfortable. "I think I should go help Entrapta." he said and left.

Adora made her way back to Catra and hugged her from behind. She felt Catra tense slightly then relax as her tail wrapped itself around Adora's leg.

"Not that I'm complaining," Catra said as she started to purr. "But what brought this on?"

"Nothing," Adora said. "I just really wanted to."

"Well I'm glad you di-don't you dare!" Catra snapped. Adora looked up to see that Bow was surreptitiously trying to take a picture of them with his tracker pad.

"But-" Bow pouted.

"No."

"Adora!" Entrapta called out. "I could use She-Ra's help, here, my cosmic attenuator seems to be stuck."

"I'm coming!" Adora reluctantly let Catra go. "You two, behave." 

Adora willed the sword into her outstretched hand. "For the Honor of Greyskull!" 

As She-Ra's power flowed through her body, once again Adora felt a presence fill her awareness. She-Ra wasn't another person not completely, but Adora felt like there was someone with her, lending her strength and courage. This feeling was so much stronger now, ever since she no longer needed the Sword of Protection. It reminded her of something Madame Razz said, that the First Ones made the sword to control She-Ra, but they didn't make She-Ra, so who was she?

Adora felt like she could never escape from the questions she had, but she was getting closer to the answers.

\------

Despite the pace at which they were moving, they had plenty of time to make this trip as comfortable as possible. Glimmer was reading a list of supplies and Bow was confirming them on his tracking pad. 

"Practice gear?"

"Extra arrows?"

"Chairs for the bridge?

"One for everybody and installed yesterday."

"Mattresses?"

"Not yet."

Bow called out to Adora. "We have some better mattresses, where do you want us to put yours?"

"In the bunkroom of course." Adora replied a little confused.

"Bow and Glimmer exchanged a look. "We uh, figured that people would want their own rooms to sleep in."

"Dibs on the engine room!" Entrapta yelled.

Adora got it. "Oh, ohhhhh. Right"

"Idiot," Catra laughed. "Just leave it for now Bow, we haven't chosen yet." Then more quietly to Adora, "I'd rather not see the brig again...."

"Of course." Adora didn't like the brig either, despite it being the place they first really reconnected, Adora had too many memories of a traumatized Catra to want to sleep in that room again. 

A wicked expression crossed Adora's face. "Of course just because we're not in the brig doesn't mean we can't play prisoner and guard though right?"

"Adora!" Catra whisper-screamed as she looked to see if Bow and Glimmer heard. She was even blushing. 

Adora smirk widened.

"How can you go from being completely naive to—" Catra didn't know how to finish the sentence.

"It's a gift I guess. Let's go find a room."


	6. The Best Friend Squad in Space

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang says good bye to the rest of the Princess Alliance, and heads of to Eternia.

The night before they left all the princesses came over for a farewell party. It was a smaller affair than Glimmer and Bow's Declaration, pretty much just the Princess Alliance.

Glimmer maneuvered Mermista into a quiet corner with her, Adora and Catra. "So, when is Sea Hawk going to offer his Declaration?" Glimmer asked.

In response Mermista put her hand over Glimmer's mouth. "Not so loud. If he hears you he'll do it right now."

"You don't want him to?" Adora asked.

Mermista looked a little guilty. "It's not that. You know how he is though, he's just so dramatic. Anything he does is going to be SO over the top- and probably involve fire." She groaned. I should make a law saying Declarations only need a couple of witnesses. Too many people is just tacky." Mermista, looked at Glimmer. "Yours wasn't too bad though."

"Gee thanks."

"I'm gonna go find Frosta, my drink is too warm." Mermista made her way back to the larger group.

Glimmer left in the other direction.

Catra turned to Adora. "Something I don't get. If Mermista runs her kingdom, why isn't she a Queen like Sparkles?"

"I have no idea." Adora said. "I got all my knowledge about Princesses from the Horde and you know how accurate that was."

Catra smirked. "What, you mean Princesses aren't all monsters who think they're better than everyone else? Seriously though, You're a Princess, and you don't know what that means for you?"

"Well it's not like I have a kingdom," Adora said. "I think it's more of an honorary title than anything else."

"Maybe, but what if it's not? I heard everything Glimmer told Horde Prime about the Heart of Etheria, plus I didn't completely ignore Entrapta's ramblings either." Catra took Adora's hands in hers. I know you want to find out more about your past as a First One, and I completely support that, but don't forget there are still things for you to learn about here on Etheria."

Adora blinked as she took in what Catra said. "You're right, there's still a lot I don't know, but I can't stop thinking about the First Ones and where I came from, and-"

"I know," Catra said, squeezing Adora's hands gently. "It's okay, starting tomorrow, we're going to find out."

\---

The next morning everyone gathered to see them off. There were some tears and lots of hugs- mostly from Scorpia. Adora was used to the strength of Scorpia's hugs, however she was surprised to see how hard Catra hugged Scorpia back.

Adora was starting to chafe at all these last minute conversations. Gimmer was talking with her dad and aunt. Entrapta was talking with Hordak. Bow, with his parents, even Catra was talking to Perfuma.

Finally the others joined her and they were off.

\--

It was about three days into the trip when Glimmer brought up the idea of training. "I have my powers right now, but who knows how long they'll last," she explained. "I think I need to practice fighting without using my powers."

Bow was also going to practice using his bow as a staff-like weapon for those occasions where he was out of arrows, or as Catra put it 'we fight someone with a pair of scissors.'

The Horde for all it's well, evilness, was very good at training regimens, Bow and Glimmer improved quickly and Adora was a capable instructor. Though she had an occasional tendency to fall back into her own training and encouraged the pair to 'get those evil princesses'

Then there was a short lived attempt to showcase more advanced techniques by sparring with Catra in front of everyone, but that idea was discarded after an intense sparring session suddenly became an equally intense but not completely unexpected makeout session.

Still the training helped to keep Adora's mind focussed on things other than their destination.

But once they arrived, Adora could think of nothing else.

"We're in orbit," Bow announced as everyone gathered on the bridge. "Where do you want to set down?"

Adora stared at the blue-grey sphere displayed on the viewscreen. Eternia. This could actually be the home planet of the First Ones. This could be her home planet.

"We should find out if there are any people down there," Adora said softly.

"Darla's sensors are showing several groupings of lifesigns around the eastern continent," Entrapta said. "Looks like several villages and towns."

"Let's start with one of the villages." Catra said. "Somewhere where we can't be surrounded, like near the coast. I'll get Melog to hide the ship as we descend, that way it won't be too obvious that we're not from this planet. And we'll stay hidden until we can get a good look at the village, make sure we haven't come across any Horde clones. Also everyone stays close to Glimmer so she can teleport us back to the ship- that reminds me, Sparkles can you tell if your powers will work he- What?" Catra stopped as she realised everyone was staring at her.

"It's nothing really," Adora said. "I'm just reminded how much easier it would have been if you had joined the rebellion with me."

"You know if I had switched sides when you did Adora, they wouldn't have even needed She-Ra."

"You know," Glimmer said. "She might have a point, we might have had the wrong horde officer all along" Then she winked in response to Adora's slightly hurt look. 

"You heard Catra," Glimmer said to Bow. "When Melog is ready, take us down."


	7. Wensel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Best Friend Squad arrives on Eternia and learns some disturbing news

Eternia looked a lot like the other planets they had seen after the Horde had been there. Not as barren and lifeless as the planet where they met the Star Siblings, or even Krytis, but still the land felt drained, depleted.

Glimmer couldn't sense any magic either, not outside of Melog and Adora anyway. She was however able to generate a ball of light, so she still had access to her own stored power.

They had set down about two miles from the edge of the village, and about half a mile from what had looked to be a road leading towards it.

The group dressed themselves in nondescript cloaks and made their way to the road intending to approach the town posing as a group of travelers. As they got within eyesight, Catra and Melog went invisible and scouted ahead, while the others waited.

"Everything looks good," Catra said when she returned. "Let's go."

Just before they got to the village proper, they encountered a man driving a wagon. Bow stepped out to meet him.

"Hi there, we're just a bunch of ordinary travellers who have gotten just a little turned around. Could you tell us the name of the village you just left?"

The man scratched behind his ear. "Well I'm not sure where else you'd be trying to reach out this way, but if you were looking for the Village of Wensel, you found it."

"Yes Wensel is exactly where we wanted to be." Bow said. "Thank you so much."

"You're welcome," the man said. "Say that is a gorgeous cat you got there. Are you here to sell it?"

"Excuse me?" Adora said, the slightest edge creeping into her voice.

The man pointed at Melog. "Your cat, never seen one that color before. Brave too, all the local cats around here are scared of their own shadow. Makes them really hard to catch."

"No, they're my friend." Adora said, instinctively reaching out to grab Catra as she felt the other girl move beside her.

The man seemed oblivious to the danger he was now in. "Well I'm sure the trappers here would love to know you make friends, but me I have to be going. Nice to meet you all." He shook the reins and his horse dutifully started to walk again.

Once he was out of earshot, Glimmer spoke. "Maybe Catra and Melog should wait here?"

Catra shook her head. "We're not splitting up again. I'll just go invisible with Melog."

Adora turned to Catra. "Please don't cause any trouble when we're in there." 

Catra looked back at the wagon as it continued on its way. "No promises." She turned back to Adora. "But I'll try."

Melog voiced their agreement and the two of them vanished.

\--

Wensel would not have looked out of place on Etheria. Simple two story buildings, more stone than wood. There were plenty of signs in the First Ones language but no real signs of any advanced technology. Adora could feel the disappointment radiating off of Entrapta.

"I'm not reading anything resembling First Ones or even Horde technology," she said, giving her scanner pad a smack. "Either their technology is so far advanced I can't detect it or there's nothing here."

"We are in a pretty remote area," Glimmer said. "I'm sure the bigger cities will have plenty of tech."

"Good point, let's go there." Bow grabbed Entrapa's arm as she turned to head out of the village and back to the ship.

"Not yet," he said. "We need to learn more about this place first."  
"Oh riiight," Entrapta said. "We need more data, I understand."

"Speaking of," Glimmer said. "That guy right there seems like a good place to start." She gestured at a well dressed man leaving a shop.

Once again Bow took the lead. "Hello there sir."

The man smiled as he saw the group walking towards him. "Hello travellers, well met."

"Well met sir," Bow responded "And what a glorious day to be free of the Horde."

The man looked confused. "The Horde? What do you mean 'free of the Horde?."

"Are you telling me the Horde never conquered this place?" Adora asked.

The man looked even more confused. "Conquered is a strange way to put it, like I said they were here centuries ago. Told us we were now the fortunate subjects of Horde Prime, but they were only here a short while"

"Why'd they leave?" Adora asked. 

"The legend says they were called back by their king to destroy a great darkness. Then we never heard from them again. Or so some believe."

He looked at them closely. "Where are you from that you don't know this?"

"We're um from uh.-" "We're from across the sea." Bow finished for Adora.

"Across the sea, well that is amazing, and you said the Horde is still there?"

"Not anymore," Bow said loudly for you see the evil Horde Prime was defeated by She-"

As Bow was declaring the Horde was no more, the man made a shushing noise. Once Bow had fallen silent he responded. "For you that seems to be a good thing, but Linare and Metris have just announced the birth of their child. The village is throwing a celebration for them tomorrow. They like many here, believe that the Horde protects this village from the Tithe, 

"Wait, what's the tithing and why would the Horde spare their child? Or anyone for that matter?" Glimmer asked.

The man was lost in thought. "The Horde, the actual Horde walked among you, and no Tithes, but now they're gone. What does that mean for Linare and Metris? Oh no oh no oh no…"  
The man began to pace worriedly, Adora grabbed him. "That's what we're trying to find out. What is the Tithe?"

The man took a deep breath. "Once every generation, infant girls across Eternia disappear from their beds and are never seen again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the increased time between chapters, there's a lot of exposition coming up which is a little hard to write for me.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The best friend squad learn some horrifying news

"Wait, say that again?" Adora asked, a feeling of dread coming over her.

The man had stopped pacing, but he was still visibly upset. "Once every generation, dark portals appear and baby infant girls disappear. No one knows what happens to them."

"And this happens to every baby girl? Glimmer asked?

"No, not every girl." Last Tithe no one in the village was taken, but the Tithe before that we lost two out of five girls. And the tithe before that we lost all but one. The last girl's family prayed extensively for the Horde's protection. And it worked, that's why people believe in the Horde.

"But correlation doesn't equal causation." Entrapta interrupted. There's no evidence that the Horde affected the portals. If fact we know they don't because we know Hordak-"

Catra clasped an invisible hand over Entrapta's mouth but the man was so distracted he hadn't realised what had happened.

Glimmer stepped in to fill the sudden silence. "So does everyone believe that the Horde protects them?"

"Everyone here does," the man said. "I know there are some villages who look to the old Gods, or our ancestors. I don't know how well it works for them though, we can only go with what saves our girls."

Bow stepped back to help Catra control Entrapta-who was getting increasingly frustrated with the villager's disregard for the scientific method.

"Do you know if there's another village nearby who lost a girl?" Adora asked.

"We don't really talk about such things, no one likes to compare losses."

"Oh."

"The University in Forelli can help you though, they've been keeping records of the Tithe for centuries."

"Great, how do we get there?" Adora asked a little too quickly.

"It's a five day ride from here I'm afraid."

"I guess we better get going then."

"Adora, wait." Bow said. He turned to the man. "The University, would they also have information about Eternia's history and technology?"

The man laughed. "It would be a poor university if it didn't. If you're planning to go, I'd suggest you wait until morning, you won't make it very far before dark."

"Thank you," Glimmer said. "Is there a place we can spend the night?"

"The inn's just down that street there you can't miss it. I'm glad I could be of help to you, but I best be heading home," He said as he headed off in the other direction.

"Thanks again," Bow said as he started to walk towards the inn.

"Wait," Adora said. "We aren't really going to spend the night are we? Darla can get us there in minutes." 

"Even so," Bow said. "We'd still get there pretty late in the day. Better off to start fresh. Besides it gives us a chance to ask around a little more. Get a better feel for people's opinions on things."

"Bow's right," Entrapta added. "A good scientist never relies on just one set of data points before coming to a conclusion."

"I suppose you're right."

Once they got to the inn they realised the flaw in their plan, none of them had any money.  
Fortunately, Bow was able to barter some of his trick arrows and that they'd wash all the dishes that evening for meals and a single room.

While Bow was negotiating, most of the others made small talk with the rest of the occupants of the inn's common room. Once their meals were ready they all sat at a table in the corner and compared notes.

"I don't know if the village is as pro-Horde as we were led to think," Glimmer said. "The people I talked to were mostly indifferent."

"I dunno," Adora said. "I talked to someone who really believed the Horde protected the village, they had an Aunt who was spared." Adora looked around the table. " Did anyone hear anything about the First Ones? The person I spoke to had never heard of them."

Everyone shook their heads.

"I did get confirmation of pretty much everything else that we were told about the Tithe." Catra said. She had become visible while they were in the inn, but she still wore the hood of her cloak up.

"I still don't understand that." Bow said. "Why so many portals? And why only once a generation?"

"I have a theory," Entrapta said. "Generating portals takes a lot of power. I think it must have taken Light Hope years, even decades to build up enough power to create the portals."

"Then why so many?" Glimmer asked. "Wouldn't it have made more sense to just do one portal? And why had she been doing it for so long?"

"Oh that's easy, the portals wouldn't be stable. Light Hope had sustained a lot of damage when Mara brought Etheria to Despondos. She could open portals on Eternia and could even have specific targets, but she couldn't control that it would connect all the way to Etheria, so she went with quantity, to maximise her chances of a successful transport"

"She might not even have had that much control," Adora said quietly. "Hordak came to Etheria through a portal, but he wasn't on Eternia, that could have been Light Hope too."

"Oh good point Adora," Entrapta said, pulling out her tracking pad and making some calculations. "Adjusting for planetary differences, Hordak's arrival on Etheria does seem to line up with an occurrence of the Tithe on Eternia three generations back."

Glimmer paled. "If Light Hope's been doing this for centuries, then she must have abducted dozens, maybe hundreds of baby girls-"

"And I'm the only one that made it." Adora said quietly

The table fell silent.

After they had finished cleaning up for their host, the group made their way to their room to discover it only had one bed. Before they could even begin to discuss who was going to get sleep there, Catra jumped on it and tried to pull Adora on with her.

"C'mon Catra'" Adora said, you know as well as I do, we can handle sleeping on the floor a lot better than they can.." She indicated Bow and Glimmer with a smirk.

Bow protested. "Hey we've slept on the ground plenty of times during the rebellion, and I didn't see you turning down that better mattress for Darla."

Glimmer elbowed him in the ribs. "Do you really want to sleep on the floor?"

"Well no-"

"Then shut up." Bow shut up.

They split the pillows and blankets as best they could. Entrapta slept on one side of the bed using her hair to make sort of a nest. Adora and Catra on the other. Melog hopped up on to the bed and curled up at Bow and Glimmer's feet.

Catra glared. "Traitor," but Melog ignored her.

\--

"Ow." Adora sat up and looked at her hand. She had apparently slammed it against the bed while she slept. Fortunately it wasn't hard enough to wake Bow and Glimmer, Catra on the other hand. Adora turned to see her girlfriend looking over her shoulder at her.

"You okay?"

"Yeah I guess i was just thrashing around in my sleep again. I didn't hit you did I?

"No I'm fine," Catra paused. "You've been thrashing around in your sleep a lot recently."

"I know, I'm sorry."

"You're fine." Catra patted the floor beside her indicating Adora should lie down again. As she did Catra turned her so that she was the little spoon.

Adora relaxed as she felt Catra's arms and tail wrap around her.

"I know today was kinda rough," Catra said as she moved in closer. "But we don't know if that guy knows what he's talking about. Okay?"

"Okay." Despite Catra's assurances it still took Adora a long time to fall back asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this chapter took so long real life can be a jerk i promise it won't be so long before the next chapter.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Adora and the squad continue their search for answers

The group arrived in Foreli a little before midday. The city was markedly more advanced than Wensel. Low hovering skiffs travelled along the streets. There was the occasional robot walking among the various pedestrians. Adora however was surprised how dirty the city was. Several buildings had tall chimneys that billowed smoke, there were many pipes that dripped black fluid, and there was a faint acrid smell that came and went with the breeze.

"Anyone else reminded of the old Fright Zone?" Glimmer asked.

"The Fright Zone wasn't so bad. Catra said. It certainly smells better than this place.

"That's true," Adora said. "On the other hand the Fright Zone never had a building like that. 

The University had been blocked from view by buildings acting like a giant wall, but when they got to the main entry road, they could see the campus in full.

The campus stood in stark contrast to the rest of the city. It was a wide open field of blue-green grass, dotted with trees. There were a few small buildings spread throughout the grounds, but the main building was obvious. 

The University looked like two buildings joined together, half of it looked like most of the buildings in Foreli although this building was in pristine condition. The other half looked like what Adora imagined the First Ones ruins to look like in their prime, a mixture of metal and crystal except unlike the abstract shapes on Etheria, this building was built to look like the top half of a human skull.

"Grayskull.." Adora said, an awed hush to her voice.

"So where do we start?" Glimmer asked.

"History, I guess," Catra said. "We should focus on getting information about the First On-"

"Which way to the science building?" Entrapta asked, grabbing a passing student. Then taking off in the direction he pointed.

Bow ran off after her. "I'll keep an eye on her. You go find out about Eternia's history. Contact me on the tracker pad when you're done."

Glimmer turned to the student, still shaken from his encounter with Entrapta.  
"Sorry about our friend, could you tell us where we can find the History department?"

The student pointed directly at the skull itself. "You can't miss it."

Adora, Glimmer, and Catra headed towards the building, with Melog following invisibly.   
As they reached the giant skull two of the teeth sank into the ground revealing a doorway. There were several students waiting for the door to open. Adora approached one.

"Excuse me, we are travelling Scho-LARS, looking for the Histo-REE department."  
The student blinked. 

"The History department?" Glimmer repeated.

"Upstairs, on your left."

"Thanks." Catra said, then quietly to Adora; "Sweetie, let's let Sparkles do the talking when get there okay?"

"What? Why?" 

"Cause she doesn't pronounce words like a crazy person. Just trust me."

\--

After following the directions there were two doors with First Ones writing on it. 

"What do they say?" Glimmer asked. 

"The one on the left says 'Ancient History', the one on the right is 'Modern History'"

"Okay then," Catra said. "Ancient History it is." and opened the door. Inside was a tall thin man, with short black hair. He looked up in surprise.

"It is customary for students to knock." he said.

"I'm sorry," Glimmer said, moving in front of Catra. "We don't actually study here, we're from overseas actually and we're doing research on 'The First Ones'. Can you tell us anything about them?"

"The First Ones? Oh you mean the So-Called Saviours? Normally I'd tell you to join my class, but since you're clearly not from around here," indicating Catra with a tilt of his head. "I'll make an exception. I can definitely tell you about them, but in return I want you to tell me what your 'research' has uncovered. I'm sure we can learn a lot from each other." He paused. "Aren't you going to take notes?"

"Oh right." Adora said. She took out the tracker pad and sat down opposite the professor. Glimmer took the second chair, and Catra pulled her hood back up and slouched in the far corner.

The professor leaned back in his chair. "About twenty-five hundred years ago, Eternia had almost run out of magic-do you know what magic is?"

They nodded.

"Oh good, many of my students have trouble grasping the concept. Ancient Eternia used magic and technology together in almost every endeavour. What had happened though is that they were using magic at a pace much faster than the planet could generate it so they were running out. There were two main factions with ideas as to how to solve this problem. There were the Technologists who wanted to move away from magic as a resource and just use pure technology. The second group at the time was called the Saviours of Magic. Their idea was to leave Etheria and find other sources of Magic and bring it back to Etheria. 

Eventually it was decided both plans would be attempted. All use of magic stopped except in the construction of spaceships. Meanwhile the Technologists began trying to adapt existing technology to run without magic. Unfortunately, it became clear that most technology would have to be rebuilt from ground up as adapting the existing technology was too difficult to adapt in most cases."

He smiled at them. "Though I'm sure you could tell from this very building, that there are exceptions.

The professor continued. "Five-hundred-and-thirty-nine space ships took off from Eternia searching for magic, meanwhile here on Eternia we continued to rebuild."

"Did the Saviours ever come back?" Glimmer asked.

"Technically no," The professor replied. "After about a hundred and seventy years, they sent a message." He grabbed a book from the bookshelf behind him and flipped through it until he found what he was looking for.

"Dearest Cousins," he read from the book. "We are the descendants of your great Saviours. The universe is vast and full of magic. You no longer need to suffer on that desiccated husk of a planet. We are no longer Eternians, we are now the First. The first in power and knowledge and the first spread across the galaxy. You cousins, will be our second wave.  
Expect our return soon."

"Wow," Adora said. "What happened next?"

"The Eternians told them not to bother and to get lost. Even before they left, the common opinion of the Saviours was that they were a group of condescending elitists, and this certainly didn't help."

Catra laughed.

"What's so funny?" Adora asked. 

"Condescending elitists is a pretty good description of the First Ones to me."

"That's not fair," Adora said.

Catra arched an eyebrow "Isn't it?"

Adora conceded the point "Okay fine, maybe for the ones in charge."

"Thank you."


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Squad's History lesson continues.

The professor looked like he was about to ask a question so Glimmer beat him to it.

"Did the First Ones ever contact Eternia again?" she asked.

"Hmm? Oh no, that was the only known communication."

"They really didn't like being told 'No' huh?" Catra said.

"Apparently not," the professor replied.

"So nothing happened after that?" Adora asked.

The professor looked offended. "My dear Everything happened after that. The Great Silver Rush, the rise of Elmayne the Mighty and the fall of his Great-Grandson Elmayne the fourth-"

"I'm sorry," Adora said. "I meant nothing happened with the First Ones, what about the Horde?"  
"The Horde? Ah I see, your interest lies not so much with Eternia itself but those who have left it. I suppose it only makes sense.

The Horde arrived on Eternia almost a thousand years ago. Their technology surpassed anything we had seen, even now."

"What happened?" Glimmer asked.

"They established a base of operations and began to take over, but records indicated their conquest was rather matter of fact. We had no resistance, Eternia was pretty much absorbed immediately. 

"I don't understand," Adora said. "When the Horde attacks they don't leave anything behind-er I mean according to our rese-arch."

"Well the fact that they weren't here for very long, would be the likeliest answer," the professor said, his eyebrows raised as he looked at Adora.

"What do you mean they weren't here for very long?" Catra asked.

"Records indicate they were here for less than ten years, then they left all at once."

"Do you know why?" Adora thought she might already know the answer, but needed to hear it.

"Again this is mostly speculation, but what little records we have it seems as though they were called away to fight.."

"You don't think-" Catra began.

"The timing fits," Glimmer said, talking over her. "That means that if Mara had let them use the heart-"

"No!" Adora interrupted. "It was too unstable; it would have destroyed everything, not just the Horde."

The professor coughed loudly. "I think it's time you shared some information and tell me what this is really all about. Let's start with where you're really from.

Adora and the others returned to their original positions and began to explain about the First Ones and the Horde, then Etheria. Then finally about Light Hope and the portals.

"Wait, you're telling me that for all these centuries the Tithe was this 'Light Hope' bringing our children to your Etheria?"  
"Attempting to, yes." Adora said. Even though they had explained everything else Adora hadn't revealed she was a First One—or Eternian to be more accurate. She wasn't ready for that yet.

"That certainly answers a lot of questions about the Tithe. In fact, some of the most debated questions we've ever had." The professor said. "It's a shame that there's no physical evidence that can support this." 

"What questions?" Gimmer asked.

"Well for example, it explains why the Tithe changed over the years. People forget, but back when it first began, it was called the Reaping. Whole families would disappear, in one case a whole village, but over the centuries the Tithe became more specific in who was taken. At first it was anybody. Then it was mostly women, old, young it didn't matter, at least first, over time the Tithe started to focus on younger and younger victims first girls, then infants."

"In fact," the professor continued. "This might even explain why not every girl was taken. Your Light Hope might have been looking for girls with specific traits who could become your 'She-Ra'." He gave a half hearted chuckle. "So much for the 'Grace of Grayskull'"

"Grace of Grayskull?" Adora asked .

"An old expression," the professor said. "If someone is extremely lucky, especially when it comes to escaping harm, we say that they were saved by the 'Grace of Grayskull'.

"And Grayskull is..." Adora prompted.

"Grayskull is, or was, one of our most popular gods. A Sorcerer-King, Grayskull was the first to wield magic, a gift he gave to all Eternians."

"Should have given out brains to go with it," Catra said. "First Ones have a bad track record with magic."

The professor chuckled. "He probably should have. Still, he's still very popular, especially as we get closer to a potential Tithing."

"The village we went to first believed the Horde was protecting them," Glimmer said. "They never mentioned Grayskull at all."

"I've heard there are places with unique beliefs about the Tithe, but that's not really my area of expertise."

"Who would be the expert?" Adora asked. "If we wanted to talk to someone about the last Tithe, like who was taken, that sort of thing, who would we talk to?"  
Glimmer and Catra exchanged looks, but didn't say anything. 

"You'll want my colleague Professor Telfin who teaches Modern History," the professor said. "She has extensive records of the past ten Tithes I believe. She's not here today, but she's a friend, come back tomorrow afternoon and I'll make an introduction."

"That's great," Glimmer said we'll see you then.

The three women left the professor's office and returned to the front entrance, Bow and Entrapta were already waiting for them. As they walked back to Darla, Entrapta spoke in great detail about the current level of Eternian technology and how it compares to both First one and Horde technology. After attempting to follow along for about five minutes, Adora pulled Bow to the back of the group and asked for a summary.

"About the level of tech that Hordak had," Bow answered. "Perhaps a little more advanced. Not on the level of Horde Prime."

"So we can work with it?" Adora asked.

"We should be able to. yeah. Why?"

"The man we spoke to today was really helpful, I'd like to help him back if we can. I'll talk to Entrapta about it when we get back to the ship."

It was at dinner when Adora explained what she wanted.

"Entrapta, do you think you can pull as much information about First Ones history as you can from Darla's memory banks and copy it onto a data crystal the Eternians can access?"

"I should be able to," Entrapta said. "Despite millenia of divergence, there's still a surprising amount of compatibility from what I've seen. I'll get right on it." Entrapta stood up and left the table.   
.  
"You can finish dinner first!" Adora called after her.

Catra gave Adora a 'what did you expect?' look.

After everyone finished eating, the rest of the squad spent the evening talking about their day and impressions of Eternia (with Adora occasionally getting pulled away to grant Entrapta administrator access to Darla's databanks.) Eventually though, it was time for bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> According to the wiki Grayskull was the first King of Eternia and the one who sent Hordak to Despondos. Since that clearly doesn't work with the New She-Ra canon, so I made him more of a mythological figure that still hopefully explains why both the First Ones and Mara's rebels referenced him.


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Catra and Adora have a heart to heart with some hand to hand.

Adora dreamt of stars. Watching them twinkling brightly through a window she did not recognise. Her body felt strange too, misshapen somehow. Before she could figure out what was wrong with her she heard a baby cry.

Adora turned and saw a baby in a crib, wailing. 'It's alright,' she thought 'I'm here' and vainly tried to reach from her crib to his (how did she know he was a boy?), so she could comfort him. That's when it hit her, 'her crib' she looked at her arm it was chubby and small with short little fingers. The other infant began to scream. Then there was a flash of darkness.

Adora awoke flinging the bed sheet off of her. She felt a sharp pain in her right forearm as it collided with Catra's forehead. Now both girls were wide awake. 

"Oh no are you ok?" Adora asked as she rubbed her arm.

"I'm fine." Catra grumbled. "What happened?"

"It's nothing," Adora said. "Just a nightmare."

"It's not nothing, this is happening almost every night. I haven't seen you like this since we were cadets. What's going on?"

"I don't know how to explain it, I'm just stressed. The last few days have been nuts you know?"

"Duh," Catra said "I've been right beside you, remember?" The comment was meant to be lighthearted but it didn't quite land. Catra went to their bags and pulled out some clothes, passing some to Adora.

"What are you-?" Adora started.

"We're going to burn off some of that nervous energy. Besides if you're going to keep hitting me I want a chance to defend myself." Catra glanced quickly at Adora's face to see if this joke went over any better, and was rewarded with a small chuckle.

Catra led them to the storage room the group had turned into a training area. She grabbed a pair of staves and tossed one to Adora who caught it easily.

"You hated training," Adora said, surprised by all this. "You practically had to be dragged to it."

"I liked it plenty," Catra shrugged. "I just never let anyone know I did. You know Shadow Weaver, if I let on I cared about anything she'd use it against me."

"Right," Adora said, unable to look Catra in the eye.

"Hey." Catra tapped her staff against Adora's. "Don't, we're not going there tonight. This is about what's going on with you.

Ready? Begin."

Catra began moving her staff in the standard warm up pattern. Adora quickly followed and the room was filled with the rhythmic clacking of the staves connecting over and over. Adora could do these movements in her sleep, but she was still surprised by how naturally it came to Catra as well.

Catra read Adora's reaction, and acknowledged it with a tilt of her head. "I've practiced a bit with Scorpia. Perfuma, thinks this would work better for me than meditation."

"Perfuma advocating violence? Yeah right."

"It's not violent, it's more like dancing-" Catra caught herself after seeing Adora's eyes widen.  
"Dancing is the wrong word, but it forces you out of your head and be more in the moment. Anyways we're getting off topic. Talk to me."

It's just... ever since we got here I've been having dreams," Adora said. "Or at least I thought they were dreams. I'm not so sure now."

"What kind of dreams?" 

"I'm looking out a window and I can see stars, sometimes I can hear a woman singing, they feel like memories."

Catra's staff smacked the tip of Adora's, throwing her slightly off balance. "You can't have memories from being a baby."

"I know, I told Light Hope the same thing, when she told me she was the one who brought me here, but even as she told me I had like this flash, and this is before we left the dimension of Despondos. What if I am remembering Catra?"

"So what if you are?" Catra said. "It doesn't change anything. You were here and you got taken to Etheria, this isn't news." Catra's movements began to speed up, forcing Adora to match her. "These dreams of yours aren't why you've been having trouble sleeping. Not really."

"Why would you say that?"

Catra swung her staff at Adora's ankles forcing her to jump over it. "Because I KNOW you dummy. You're feeling bad about all those other kids that got grabbed by Light Hope's portal. News flash Adora, it's not your fault. You didn't make her create the portals, and you certainly didn't make them fail."

"But all those babies," Adora said, backing away from Catra's assault. "Centuries of portals—"

Catra pressed forward. "And you're the only one that made it. To Etheria anyway, we don't know where the others ended up. They could have ended up on another planet entirely and had great lives."

"But why me?—"

"Why you? I don't know, Maybe Etheria's magic helped bring you to it because it needed you to be She-Ra, Maybe it was just dumb luck. It doesn't matter why you survived, you just did. And you saved the universe. So how about instead of feeling guilty for something you didn't do, you start feeling proud of the things you did do."

"But—"

"No buts you are going to stop feeling guilty, even if I have to beat it out of you." Catra swung even harder. 

Adora barely got her staff up in time to block. If Catra understood just how close she came to actually hurting Adora she didn't show it, she just continued her attack. Adora desperately defended herself against her girlfriend's onslaught. Not even having a chance to speak, to beg her to back down.

Adora didn't quite block in time and Catra landed a solid blow on Adora's right shoulder. She stumbled spinning away from the other girl.

"Stop it!" Adora yelled, grabbing her shoulder.

"Make me." Catra swung again.

Adora blocked. She stepped back again, but this time when Catra stepped forward to fill the space, Adora attacked for the first time. Catra blocked it easily, but Adora expected that what the attack did was give her the opening to shift from a purely defensive position to one where she could attack as well.

As they continued to spar, Adora studied Catra. Her girlfriend was strong and fast, and moved with a grace that made Adora's body ache in jealousy. If Glimmer and the others were to see her in action they would say Catra was born with the staff in her hands, but to Adora's trained eyes, she could see the truth. Catra always preferred to fight with her bare hands using the staff forced her to move ever so slightly against her instincts.  
It was her eyes, Catra still needed to look where the staff was going. So that's where Adora focussed her attention, Catra's eyes would tell her everything she needed to know.

Adora pushed forward with her attack, Catra reluctantly gave ground. Adora swung at Catra's right knee, she moved to block but realised just a split second too late the real target was her left knee. Catra was able to block, but she was left vulnerable to a knee to her midsection. Just a few moments later it was over. Adora had Catra disarmed and pinned against a wall.

"Do you yield?" Adora asked.

"I yield." Catra leaned in and kissed Adora on the tip of her nose, taking advantage of the distraction to slip away.

"See how much better things are when you stop thinking everything to death and just be in the moment?"

"I do," Adora said. "Thank you." Adora paused. "Now that I've learned my lesson how about we hit the shower?"

Catra grinned. "What a great idea." She started quick walking towards the door. "I hope you know I let you win," Catra smirked before she took off running.

"You wish." Adora laughed and chased after her.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fanfic I've written in a long time, so forgive me if I'm rusty.
> 
> It doesn't really apply to this chapter, but this story treats Don't Go by "Annacharlier" as canon. 
> 
> Adora and Catra still have some ways to go in their personal growth, and this is my way of exploring it.
> 
> I didn't have a beta reader for Chapter one. If you're interested in being my beta reader please let me know.
> 
> I really want to know what people think so please comment.


End file.
